02 de Abril de 2020 -

How do I deal with conflicts constructively?

por Felipe Dib

Hello, my friend! How are you? If you're out of time or "in a rush", go to the last paragraph of this text for a fast answer.

In times of immediate responses and connection 24 hours a day, talking about long-term transformation is a risk! But… we believe you can (and must!) dream big, and make a daily effort to get better every day. This is our mission - seeing you speaking English and being a Leader wherever you go. "The 5 Essential People Skills" was written by Dale Carnegie and its goal is to improve your people skills. In other words, to improve your relationships at work and at home.

Last class we talked about the importance of writing your deals, goals, feelings. If you do it you'll see the benefits of clarifying your ideas and understanding better your emotions. We've talked about aggression before (you can watch our previous videos to see it) and we'll see another strategy today. "Even if you use all the tools and techniques we've been discussing, there are still times when conversations will turn into confrontation and conflict". Dale Carnegie says assertiveness doesn't mean winning.

If people argue with you or even lose their tempers, just remain calmly assertive. Carnegie teaches us two steps to deal with it:

1- Acknowledge what's being said by showing an understanding of the other party's position;

2- State your own point of view clearly and concisely, with a little supporting evidence.

Respect the other person's point of view and show you've heard him/her. Then, be concise to state what you'd like to happen next. If the person gets violent, take a step back and postpone your reaction. Can you do it? Have you done that before? Comment here and see you next class!

1. Dib believes you're curious to ___.

2. No matter what you do you'll ___ find people who think differently.

3. If people lose their temper, ___.

4. While in conflict, start ___ of the other person's ___.

5. The second thing to do while in conflict is to ___.

6. ___ when you talk about your ___.

7. While in conflict, the last step is to ___.

8. The 3 steps are: ___.

9. If tension is too ___ you can ___.

10. Dib says we ___.