12 de Setembro de 2019 -

How do I give feedback?

por Felipe Dib

Hello, my friend! How are you? If you're out of time or "in a rush", go to the last paragraph of this text for a fast answer.

In times of immediate responses and connection 24 hours a day, talking about long-term transformation is a risk! But… we believe you can (and must!) dream big, and make a daily effort to get better every day. This is our mission - seeing you speaking English and being a Leader wherever you go. "The 5 Essential People Skills" was written by Dale Carnegie and its goal is to improve your people skills. In other words, to improve your relationships at work and at home.

Today we talk about the right way to give feedback. "When you're called upon to give praise or feedback, it's a good idea to think carefully about what you're going to say and to make your comments as specific and constructive as possible". Being specific gives the other person the opportunity to (at least!) understand your point so he/she can do better next time. At the same time, your feedback must be focused in the future or, in Carnegie's words, it must be constructive.

When you talk about your own accomplishments, "emphasize the hard work and effort that others put into helping you achieve the goal". You'll gain trust, credibility and respect by sharing the glory. Sometimes we tend to talk about our performance and the things we've gone through. Remember to give the credit of everyone who was direct and indirectly involved in it.

Dale also brings the importance of "assertive silence" and "leaks" when he describes assertive feedback. "Appropriate silence, assertive silence, means purposefully choosing to be quiet, listening with full attention, and making the decision not to speak, unless you know the purpose for doing so". Leaks are attitudes you try to hide, such as looking at your watch while other people talk to you...

Be specific, give credit to others and value the power of silence. Be clear about the result you want, share the glory with people who help you get there and understand that you don't need to speak all the time - a silence is much better many times and you must realize that. Can you hold yourself and be silent if someone is aggressive with you? Why (not)? Comment here and see you next class!

1. ___ before you give a feedback and be ___.

2. ___ when you talk about your ___ accomplishments.

3. You gain ___ by ___ the glory.

4. Be ___ and recognise ___ effort.

5. Unless you speak ___, you should be ___.

6. The first lesson from this class is: ___.

7. Next class we'll talk about ___.

8. ___ are attitudes you try to ___.

9. In the article Dib asks you if you can ___.

10. When you're ___ you give the other person the ___ to perform better ___.